I Finally Finished Watching The Sopranos

You have to have an opinion on the finale I suppose.

It's too obvious that the guy in the Members Only jacket went to the toilet like Michael Corleone and then whacked Tony. I think that was the ultimate red herring. The point was that when Michael did it, the last thing in the world that it could be accused of being was obvious. If you think that the likeliest guy in the place doing what the unlikeliest guy in the place did is some kind of homage, then to me you're barking up the wrong tree.

That's not to say I liked the ending, I thought it was less intelligent and clear than everything that went before it. Chase was trying too hard to be mysterious. The beauty of using symbolism is that you only need to reference one thing, referencing ten misses the point.

Still thought it was a magnificent series, though. Second only to Mad Men.

MadMenYourself

Had a first bash at the Season 4 MadMenYourself feature tonight. In anticipation of rewatching the whole thing from the start.

Here's the result:

The Fifth Doctor

I'm working nights at the moment and the consequent catastrophic effect upon my barely adequate grasp on reality is such that I've been thinking all the time about Peter Davison's great Doctor Who costume. I'm not a fan of the series by any means- I haven't seen an episode since the 80s- but I remember being struck during my childhood by how dashing the whole thing looks. It's really stuck with me too.



Taking this as a template and personalising the look is something I could really have fun with. According to Wikipedia (and who am I to dispute it?) "The Fifth Doctor's chosen mode of dress was a variation of an Edwardian cricketer's uniform, and he was even seen to carry a cricket ball in one of his pockets (which saved his life in one adventure). He wore a cream-coloured frock coat, striped trousers, plimsoll shoes, and occasionally a pair of spectacles.". Improving on the trousers and plimsolls would be a necessity, but I think there's plenty there to go on. Now where can I get a cricket ball?

QuickQuid.co.uk

Saw an advert for these pricks earlier. They charge 2950% APR. How is that even legal?

Mad Men

Just wanted to drop a quick note in about Mad Men, apropos of nothing really. I'm currently enjoying Season 2 and what prompted me to put my thoughts down here so that I don't forget was that towards the end of episode 5 I realised that as I watched I was grinning broadly. I laugh a lot but I rarely smile from enjoyment and yet something about this programme clearly hits deeply home. And yet I can't pin it down to anything specific.

After concluding Season 1 (watched in two long late-night stints) I had Season 2 on order and, for one reason or another, the dealer took a couple of weeks to get it to me. During that time I decided that it was important for me to take a break from it and come back to Season 2 afresh, that was in late Autumn of last year. I didn't think about it too deeply, I rarely do, just followed my instinct. With hindsight I realise that I was becoming spellbound by the show and it is happening again.

Intellectually, I could put up a pretty cogent and persuasive argument that Mad Men is one of the great TV shows I have ever seen. I love it for its intelligence, the fascinating thematic ground it covers (kudos too to Sloan Wilson's The Man In The Grey Flannel Suit; a great book), its confident pace, the razor-sharp deconstruction of a pivotal time in modern history, the tremendous performances and apparently simple yet devastatingly complex character arcs, the beautiful contrast between artifice and reality and for the spare but terribly profound writing.

But Mad Men's intelligence doesn't leave me grinning like that. No, I find myself beguiled by the stylised beauty of the piece. Vanity and an obsession with the aesthetics of the period make me a sucker for the programme. It isn't just the beautiful suits- and I do love how each man's stylistic taste is consistent throughout each costume, subtle but definite- or the stylish women, or the wonderful decoration, or the beautiful but much underrated score (why does no-one ever comment on the music in Mad Men? It is sublime). It is something bigger than all of those things and yet not separate from them.

But I can't quite say what it is yet. And it isn't the smoking- as attractive as that is in the absence of it's pungent acridity. No, if Serge's breathtaking Intoxicated Man didn't make me a smoker, nothing will.

The question remains, then. What is the power that Mad Men has to entrance me thus? Maybe I'll know when I reach the Season 2 finale. If not, then all my hopes lie with Season 3 which is months from screening here in the UK and I don't want to wait that long to learn the secret of my infatuation with the world's most beautiful TV show.



The picture of Peggy Olson, by the way, is there in place of the predictable Roger and Donald looking cool shot because her character's progress gladdens my heart. Feminist thought and progress of the period is a particular field of interest for me as it directly relates to my wife's Doctoral thesis. Although Peggy isn't especially likable, warm or attractive a character I'm behind her all the way.

Top 5 Female Fuzz

Cagney
Juliet Bravo
WPC June Ackland
DCI Jane Tennyson
Kima Griggs

Cor blimey it's Diagnosis Murder with Dick Van Dyke

I don't know why but I sat through an episode of this recently and, at the risk of spoiling the suspense for any avid fans who may have missed the airing, would like to share the denouement with you all.

Dick Van Dyke’s Doctor son (or son’s friend I wasn’t really watching at the start) had administered some medication to a superstar basketball player who then died. To save his son (or son’s friend) Dick had to find the real murderer. He then got to present the case for the defence in court. Man of many talents, you see.

In the Courtroom Dick Van Dyke called as a witness 'The Towel Boy’, a general Janitor for the basketball team who suffered from cerebral palsy. Dick (I can call him Dick, we’re friends) asked The Towel Boy if he had ever wanted to be a basketball player himself. The Towel Boy with cerebral palsy replied “when you’ve got cerebral palsy you’re happy just to walk in a straight line”. Then, in a startling move, Dick flung a basketball straight at The Towel Boy and The Towel Boy instinctively blocked it with his previously useless hands, protecting his face.

Haha, the game was up. Dick explained that The Towel Boy had been the same college as the (now deceased) superstar and during a trial game had been smashed against the backboard by the (to be) superstar as he slam-dunked the winner. There were major league agents at the game and The Towel Boy was ignored while the superstar taken to the big leagues and multi-million pound success.

The Towel Boy would have the last laugh, though. He disguised himself and pretended to have cerebral palsy in order to get a job in the locker rooms of the basketball team who had signed the victim up (I'm not sure why he had to pretend to have the ailment but the courtroom drama wouldn't have been as epic and unexpected otherwise, so there's a stroke of good luck). Then he proceeded to daily fill the victim’s clothes, towel and locker with cat hairs. Only The Towel Boy knew that the victim had a mysterious cat allergy and it was this- not the prescription drugs- that killed him.

Dick solved the mystery though. Seemingly without the need for any clues or evidence.

Three cheers for Dick Van Dyke!

Top 5 women from Eastenders that you wouldn’t chat up

Dot Cotton
Fat Pat
Gary Oldman's sister
Ethel and her little Willie
That fat one who looks like John Travolta on the posters for 'Hairspray'

The National Lottery- An Eye For An Eye

The Capital Punishment debate refuses to go away, but it’s okay- I have a plan.


Introduce a referendum on Capital Punishment and the names of everyone who votes for it are recorded on little balls inside a huge lottery machine. Every time a miscarriage of justice occurs and an innocent person dies, then the lottery machine produces a winner at random. The winner will then be executed to redress the balance. The execution could be televised and called “National Lottery- An Eye For An Eye”. I’d like to see someone with a hint of mischief host it, someone who’d probably make an inappropriate joke with the victim. Michael Barrymore, maybe.

Miscarriages of justice with multiple executions would be like a rollover with multiple winners, imagine the excitement to see if you were going to be lucky that night. The odds would probably better than 14 million to 1. And not only would you get fifteen minutes of fame but your thirst for murderous retribution would be satisfied in full.

I’m going to phone Channel Five in the morning.






These notes were originally published on 19 April, 2008 at theraffishdandy.wordpress.com

Top 5 TV Catchphrases

Are you having a laugh? Is he having a laugh?
Sheeeeeeeiit
Nice to see you, to see you nice
Look at what yer could've won
I didn't get where I am today

Why I know the Apprentice is faked

It suddenly occured to me reading Andrew Collins' excellent blog. The "Roulette" advert wasn't filmed by Lee McQueen and Claire at all, it was made using the outtakes of the advertisement for Beast aftershave that Stallone does in Rocky II.

Grrr!